blogging

Escape

Posted on May 18, 2013 2 Comments

In a little less than an hour I will be getting in the car and driving down to Sydney to pick Kate Says Stuff up from the airport so we can celebrate her Voices of 2013 GLORY.

And I get to leave my decidedly emo children in the capable hands of their father tonight. Perhaps because they sense my impending departure, they have spent this morning reminding me of just how much I like a break every now and then. Thoughtful creatures.

I have two phones, two portable chargers and I am ready to annoy you with incessant photo taking. You’re welcome.

And Kate and I get to test out our barefoot trainers together because although we are training partners she lives in Ballarat, Victoria and I live in Central Coast, NSW. Awkward.

When I told my husband we would be running together, he looked at me like I was MAD and said ‘a night away and you’re RUNNING?! I’d be having something to drink.’ I wouldn’t worry about that. I have a bottle of wine in the car. I am nothing if not prepared.

It will be too short. These things always are.

But the next time I’m having a rough day I will remember blogger SHENANIGANS and I will smile.

Real love ends. And begins again

Posted on April 22, 2013 46 Comments

It is with no small amount of reluctance that I say goodbye to Good Googs. My home for the last four years. My babies grew up there. I grew up there. And so it is with some degree of excitement and some degree of terror that I venture forward. Naked. Babies make excellent buffers. When in doubt, look at the baby. Because CUTE.

I am not a mummy blog anymore, and the truth is I haven’t been for awhile now. So I might as well say it out loud. I remember years ago, someone much wiser than me told me that my mummy blog days were numbered but you kind of had to start there, because it was the beginning. I remember being kind of offended. But I get it now. That was the beginning. But it doesn’t last forever. Maybe it would have gone on longer if I’d wanted to have more children. But it is coming to a natural end point and I’m alright with that.

One night, when I was mid depressive episode and pre-medication, I took my camera down to the lake. I was lying on my stomach in the grass and too teary to really know what I was taking photos of. But I had that moment. A single, teensy glimmer of clarity in amongst the hateful pit of depression. This is who you are. This will save you. And among other things, it did.

It gives me great comfort that no matter what surrounds this blog, and no matter what form it comes in, it is a constant for me. A permanent home. A sanctuary. My blog is a mountain. And it never moves.

Welcome to my mountain.

Blog Breaks and Other Indulgences

Posted on November 16, 2012 9 Comments

Some people do blog breaks, some people don’t. For the first two years of my blog I don’t think I took a break and then last year at Christmas I did take a break, and I thought it was a pretty big one, but a check of my archives tells me it was one month. It was on a whim. I just woke up one morning and said I’m going on blog break. And then I did it again in July. Although in reality I just gave myself the freedom to not post 5 days a week and posted sporadically until I came back from New York in August.

I never actually take a break from doing my iphoneography blog or really from social media, but it is the writing part that I take a break from. And now I’m actually contemplating a break of more than two months. It seems the more breaks you take the more fast and loose you become with taking the breaks. It’s a nice feeling to be able to take a break and not panic. Not worry about numbers plummeting. Or people forgetting about me. Or search engine rankings. Or any of that bullshit that you can get sucked into. The benefit of having a blog that I’m no longer trying to make a part-time income from.

Which might beg the question, if I’ve gotten rid of all of the stressful and not so fun part of blogging then why take a break at all? There is the matter of the traditional Christmas photo which I am not forgetting about. Not sure that Riley will be overly enthused at the prospect of dressing up like an elf or a wee Santa, but I can’t help but try.

And here’s the part where I do a really annoying blogger-type thing. I’m working on another creative project. And I need time and headspace to work on it. People who know me are probably sick to death of me talking about it and will be relieved to see me actually do it. So yes, this is me doing that thing where I tell you about it without telling you anything about it. I annoy me. But it will be over soon (I hope!)

On Monday I’ll be sharing an interview with my friend Karen Andrews who has written a book that I have fallen in love with – Crying in the Car: Reflections on Life and Motherhood and there will be a giveaway too so you can win a copy to devour yourself. But other than that you will see me in January or February depending on how things pan out. But if last year is anything to go by you will see considerably more posts on Iphoneography and Facebook to make up for the separation anxiety I experience whenever me and this little space part ways temporarily.

Next week I’ll be in Melbourne for a couple of days, if anyone wants to catch up in actual person let me know.

It feels weird to say Merry Christmas in November, so I won’t. I’ll just see you on the Internets.

A Bitterness

Posted on October 15, 2012 56 Comments

“I know I have a fickle heart and a bitterness,
And a wandering eye, and heaviness in my head” Adele – Don’t You Remember

Most people aren’t introverts or extroverts. They are on a spectrum. When I was twenty I was about ninety per cent introvert. It tends to change as you get older, move around. Some people more than others I suppose. Now, I’m probably about sixty per cent introvert.

Blogging conferences are hard work. I love going. I love meeting people. I love all of it. But it is exhausting. And along the way every insecurity known to man is laid bare. And it continues when I get home, while I’m still recharging. I don’t listen, much. But it plays there like a broken record. Over and over. It never gets sick of its own voice. I’m a good faker though. Sometimes I can even fake it for myself.

It’s worth it. A heady mix of friends, travel, geekery and independence. Being able to stop in the middle of a strange street to take a photo and have that be my only point of focus. And I get to eat alone. And sure it sounds weird to write that down or say it out loud. But doing anything alone is a bit like winning lotto. And eating alone is a bit like winning powerball.

At one of the sessions it was suggested that you should ask people why they read your blog. Putting aside the deeply terrifying nature of that question, I think I’d like to know. A couple of people answered me on twitter already. And now I’m asking you as well.

To Write a Not-Parenting Blog

Posted on October 1, 2012 13 Comments

Parenting blogging bores me. Not reading parenting blogs. I love that. But writing one. I am so bored at the thought of it.

It’s hard to say I don’t want to write a parenting blog. Because I don’t want to undervalue motherhood or parenting. Writing a not-parenting blog is not a loftier pursuit, by any stretch of the imagination. And people should be able to write about being a parent or about their children and have an actual emotion about it without having a ‘just’ label slapped on them. Or without making what is written so much less than what it is.

When I started this blog I had a very definite idea about parenting. And I still have that idea. But I don’t care to argue it or defend it or promote it any more. And I don’t care to view any other parent through my filter. I’m passionate about people doing whatever makes them love being a parent, in whatever shape that may be. I don’t really care what that shape is. When I was a new parent, I probably looked down my judgey mcjudgey nose at people who were smacking their toddlers in the supermarket. Now? Well now I don’t think about their parenting style. I just think they are having a rough day, and man I’ve had a few of those. And I want to give them chocolate and wine.

Today Riley had a huge kicking, screaming tantrum when she was out with Josh. She’s going through something. She’s been cranky as hell, screaming all the time, whinging more and really oppositional with Piper. Just not herself. I spend a lot of time comforting her in the face of her own emotions. She has enough insight to know what her behaviour should be, but just not the self control to put it into practice all the time. She needs so much love at the moment. I took her for a long walk down by the lake because she needs as much one-on-one time as she can get. And I watched the sunlight dance in her hair for an afternoon. But I don’t really have anything to say about that anymore. I love her. It’s hard. It’s easy. Sometimes my mental health is subpar. Her inner light could set the world on fire. But that’s between her and me.

I could always write about parenting and motherhood because it is such a defining thing. And it will always create the tone of everything that I do. But I invest every part of myself into it, that I don’t want to pour my writing self into it as well. I want to step outside my box.

I don’t know how to write a not-parenting blog. Yet. But I’ve got time. It’ll come to me.

Disenchantment with Words

Posted on September 24, 2012 7 Comments

I’ve been veering towards photos over words for awhile now. I don’t know when exactly it happened. But it did. I am a wordy person. I like words. I use lots of them. And I have a pretty big vocabulary. And I like to keep it that way. And the best way to keep it that way is to use my words.

But somehow, I like to sit back and let the photo tell the story for me.

Somehow the words don’t seem to matter that much anymore. And yes that sentence did taste like vinegar in my mouth. And it sounds defeatist and sad. But it’s not.

I get emails or messages whenever I do something wrong as a parent. Whether it is a twisted car seat strap, or a cat in the cot or letting the baby eat McDonalds. It’s an occupational hazard.

I was letting Piper drink the last few sips of my cold hot chocolate from Gloria Jeans the other day while standing in the trolley instead of sitting down. At the time I thought I should have taken a photo. I thought of captions ‘baby in unsafe position, swills back on homophobic coffee and probably burns self in process’.

Innocent things get interpreted as minimising the experience of minority groups. Snarky things get misinterpreted as literal. And even when you explain it, it doesn’t really make any difference because people always view things through their own filter. Once you let go of something words or images it is no longer yours.

I admire that the writer of American Pie always refused to explain the meaning of his song.

And I suppose that’s what I’m saying. I love storytelling. I love telling a story through images and wrapping words around that.

But I’m not going to explain the meaning of my song anymore.

Blogher and Embracing the Unbridled Panic

Posted on August 3, 2012 4 Comments

Sometimes you have to get out of your own way. And sometimes that is hard. And sometimes putting yourself out there and expecting to get the same result as you have always had your whole life, and getting an entirely different one instead changes everything.

Finding Your Voice Within the Controversy

Posted on July 2, 2012 20 Comments

Yep. Technically I’m on a bloggy break. But I get to break my own rules. Because I am the Queen of Everything on my blog. That’s why I LOVE my blog.

I was ludicrously nervous and insanely excited to be speaking on the panel about finding your voice. It was so much fun. AllConsuming was the business as the moderator. THE BUSINESS. But in a short amount of time, you don’t always say everything you want to say. Or if you do, sometimes things simmer away for a little while afterwards and it keeps you up at night. Prodding you. THAT’S what you should have said, it says.

One of the questions that Kim asked me specifically as someone who writes about often controversial parenting issues is how I handle differing opinions. At the time I talked about being certain of what I was doing for my family. And that’s true. But it is only half the story. I think the other part of it is that when I present an opinion I have a goal in mind. And that goal is not to have people agree with me or tell me I’m right. My goal is that people listen and understand. And when I’m responding to conflicting opinions that is also my goal. I don’t aim to convert people to my way of thinking. But I’ll still passionately debate anyway, because that’s my thing.

I also talked about how when you hover over the publish button and you hesitate it means you should probably publish. Lady Melbourne vehemently disagreed with that and said you shouldn’t publish. I think both approaches have their place. On the one hand I am reserved in what I publish because I want my words to be able to stand on their own even when I’m not there to explain them. And I’m hyper aware of what my children will read or what other people will search for. But I think when you have that moment of hesitation I think it means something. I think it means you are about to take a risk. And I think that risk is worth it. Most of the time the risk is worth it. Because more often than not the hesitation isn’t because you are about to divulge something that shouldn’t be published or that would be insensitive to our family’s privacy. That hesitation is about revealing a truth about yourself. And if you tell that truth then you know who you are. And what is revealed is your voice. And it is worth it.

As an openly opinionated person, not everyone likes me. But the fact is that not everyone is going to like me regardless of what opinons I have, so I might as well be myself. In my real life as well as my online life if I’m expressing an opinion, especially a controversial one I think about whether it is useful or not. If I think it’s useful then I’ll probably say it. And I’ll probably say it in a passionate way. That’s who I am.

And it may surprise you to find out where being yourself will take you. One day you might find yourself up on a stage in between two blogging icons. And you will be surprised to find that you aren’t melting into the wallpaper. You are just being yourself. Because once you find your voice, that bitch is hard to shake loose.

Blogopolis!

Posted on June 30, 2012 3 Comments

There’s something cool about going to blogging conferences outside your own niche. You get to enjoy things as they are on the fringe.

Here’s to the fringe, geeking out and hopefully not sucking on my panel about finding your voice. A girl can dream!

Big W Has an App, a Toy Spectacular and a Giveaway

Posted on June 28, 2012 66 Comments

There’s an app for that! A phrase you hear all the time but not often when it comes to braving the crowds for the toy sales. But now you will. Big W asked me to check out their new app - not just for toy sales – but very useful for it nonetheless. The benefit of toy sales for most of us is being able to get a jump on Christmas. I can’t tell you the serenity that I feel knowing that I have Christmas presents for the girls and I only need to worry about the rest of the family. Sweet, sweet serenity. And I’m lucky that my kids are still young enough that their interests don’t change that much in the 6 months between now and Christmas.

Big W are gave me $200 to explore the app shopping heaven, and you can do the same! I have a $200 voucher to give away. You too can experience the serenity.

There are some really cool things about the app. The first is that you can browse through the catalogue and add things to your shopping list. Which will come in handy if you like to focus your shopping on available bargains. But you can also search for a specific item or browse by categories.

And you don’t just have the option of buying the item but you can access online layby as well. I didn’t have an account with Big W but I was able to put in my details easily and make my way through the checkout process very quickly.

Each product has a picture, but it also has a section you can open up with details about the products, specifications and postage.

Not to mention if you are ever in Big W and need a price you can scan it with the app. I know, I’m going into geek overload as well.

There definitely is an app for that and I don’t mind saying it’s pretty awesome.

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